He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
