These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
