I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
