I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I will die if light touches me.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
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