you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I'm always down for nudity.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
