oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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