1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
