Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize