after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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