I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
