That's intense
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
