I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
