break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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