kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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