in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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