Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
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