I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
