Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
