wrigley field is MILF paradise
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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