My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize