i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Randomize
