The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
