You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
