Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
i think im in europe. pls send help
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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