Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
