How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
