so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
