I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
