When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
