You're completely useless in the revolution.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
