why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize