I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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