i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
You need Xanax blowdarts
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize