god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Randomize