I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
