Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
