You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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