some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize