You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
