so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
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