i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize