i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
