K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
the condom got lost in my hair
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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