Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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