omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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