New low: just hacked my moms facebook
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
dude. I can hear the air.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
