I'm gonna have a badass scar
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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