I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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