how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
