Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize