he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Just pee around me
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
