Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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